Well...

I've been resistant to doing this for quite some time, but I think this blog has served its purpose. I've been blogging here for 11 years (SHEESH!) and it's been everything from a place to vent, a personal journal, a place to talk about books, etc. etc. However, I just don't have the want to continue to keep it updated anymore. That's not to say that I will never be back, but I make no promises.

Currently, I book blog over at The Bees Knees Bookish Korner and you're more than welcome to follow me over there. It's hard enough keeping up with one blog, let alone two. I've started to engage with authors and publishers, so I want to make The Bees Knees my blogging priority.

I'm can also be found/stalked on:

Twitter
Facebook
Instagram
Goodreads

And probably other places that I'm just not thinking of right now. I hope to see you around! :)

Because Hate is Such a Harsh Word

I don't usually like to put my very personal, and in this case, family, drama online for all to see, but since I don't want to actually have to talk to or see any of  you people, I'm left with few options.

First of all, out of a 20 item list, only TWO of those items were directed at ONE specific person. I am not defending myself here, only explaining, so choose to believe me or not, I don't give a damn.

Secondly, I think what got everybody's panties in a twist was item number 20. So, instead of owning up to the fact the NOBODY in our so-called family asked if we needed help during a natural disaster, you all have chosen to pick apart the rest of what I wrote and find ways to make those things about you. We had FEMA. We had Navy engineers. We had strangers walking down the street offer to help. We had the neighbor across from us, with whom we had never exchanged more than a hello and a wave, offer us their spare room. We had the neighbor behind us. He stood in my driveway with me and hugged me while I cried over the damage to some irreplaceable items. We had our next door neighbor clean and repair our Christmas decorations; things the girls had made over the years that couldn't be replaced. We had our 17 and 15 year old daughters. This is the help we had to recover from a natural disaster. Not one person in our "family" offered to lift a finger and help.

It's been easy for all of you to use me, Trisha, as the scapegoat for the last 18 years. No matter what is said or done or who has said or done it, the blame is placed on my head. A big part of that is because I'm not afraid to say what needs to be said. I say what a lot of us are thinking or, let's be honest, what is being said behind backs. You know how many people have discussed item #12 over and over and in different groups and have, basically, the same opinion that I do on the subject but don't actually bring it to light like it should? Now, you're all using that as a reason to denigrate me worse than the adulteress who actually committed the act...twice. Have any of you, in your feckless cowardly choices, ever thought of those two children? Living this lie is depriving them of an entire world and culture that they deserve to be exposed to. Figure it out.

So, I wrote that entire post to specific people in Ohio. Care to tell me who got butt hurt over #7? Which one of you is forcing your cat to be a vegetarian?

It is so funny how you all have taken so many of the things I wrote and then made them about you. Honestly, I don't think about you guys that much to have that much to say about you. You all don't live in my head as much as I, apparently, live in yours.

To CJ, item #9 had absolutely nothing to do with you unless, unbeknownst to me, you have killed big game like lions and elephants. This is my point made clear that none of you actually know me at all. I come from a long line of hunters. I've always respected that and in the case of my cousin JH who hasn't bought meat from a grocery store in years, admired it. It's also clear that you didn't actually read what I wrote because I made clear the point I was trying to make. But let's be honest here. You and I have never been simpatico in the 20 years we've known each other.

Item #14. Anyone who knows me knows that picky eating is a pet peeve of mine. I've never, not once in my life, been shy about this fact of me. I truly believe that you're depriving yourself of fantastic culinary experiences by being afraid to try new things. I won't apologize for having a point of view or an opinion. As far as BP is concerned here, I told her this very thing when I opened my home to her for a month. Stop using her as an excuse to be pissed off about this one and to threaten bodily harm to me. Btw, do you know how ghetto and stalkerish and childish that makes you sound?

Oh. And #4 was about the fact that I have 1st cousins I've never met. Of the people that are so sure this one is about them, how are we related in such a way that this could be true? How, exactly, is the fact that I have relatives that I've never met make this about any one of you at all?? I didn't even have you drama queens in mind when I wrote that one. But thanks for letting me know my own mind.

Next, the fact that you all like to think that everything you hear or see coming out of my household is from me and me alone makes my husband sound like he's incapable of thinking for himself. He's in the top five of the most intelligent people that I know. He's logical, down to earth, rational, and realistic in his thinking and he's just freaking smart. Believe it or not, we agree on most topics. You all are making him out to be some kind of pussy-whipped fool, which he most certainly is not. If any of you actually understood how a marriage works, you'd know everything about my husband and I is 50/50. This is why we remain happily married after almost 20 years. Get a freaking clue here. But like I said, I get that it's easier for you guys to dump on me than it is to admit that maybe he's thinking these things too.

Lastly, I'd like to thank all of you that whipped this non-thing into the frenzy that it's become. You've made it so that I can stop pretending. If I've ever said or done anything that's thoroughly dishonest, it's been attempting to keep the peace for the last 11 years, which I've done solely for my kids and not anybody else. By reading more into this than there ever was, you've finally given me license to cut ties and that's such an unbelievable relief. Any phone numbers that I have for you have been put on my auto reject list (a feature that I LOVE about cell phones) and I've unfriended you all on Facebook and double checked my privacy settings. Most importantly, you are not welcome in our home. DO NOT use my children as a way of communicating with me. The Oldest Child is old enough to make up her mind about you guys and the Youngest Child has no idea what's going on. Try to be freaking adults, and I know how hard that is for most of you, and keep it that way. If you want to have any relationship with them at all, that is. The blatant fact that you all are so willing to believe the worst of me, to dump all blame on me, and to attack me at the drop of the hat is hurtful, not that any of you would own up to that either. I'm done giving you guys that power over me and allowing you to hurt me like that. All of you have been this big, sucking, black hole of negativity and drama in our lives FOR YEARS! I'm done. You do not fit anybody's definition of what it means to be family.

Replying Back and Other Stuff

I listen to, read, and/or watch other people's political, religious, or general opinions on topics and try my best just to let it skim over my consciousness. Even when I agree with something. I can tell when I'm at my limit when I have to repeatedly stop myself from replying and thus, take a break from social media, watching the news, or even answering my phone. That being said, I have a few things of my own that I'd like to share. I'm tired of being quiet and letting other people's opinions stomp over my own.

1. Cats are indoor pets unless they're feral. You shorten the life of your pet by letting it be an indoor/outdoor pet. You risk having it being attacked by another cat, dog, or other wildlife. You risk having it being hit by a car. You risk having it being stolen or injured by other humans. You risk unforeseen injury and illness. Declawing cats is animal cruelty and the epitome of making an uninformed decision. If you disagree, you don't understand cats shouldn't have one.
2. Adopt don't shop. I admit, that I've changed my stance on this one. Both Bailey and Hannah (our Boxer girls) were bought from breeders. Both of them died from various cancers, which indicate that they were bred by irresponsible breeders and bought by irresponsible owners, and I mean my husband and myself here. There are 1000s of homeless pets in animal shelters, rescues, and foster homes looking for their forever home. Even purebred pets. I totally believe that responsible, knowledgeable breeders have their place, but for 99% of pet shoppers, a breeder is unnecessary. AND NEVER BUY A DOG FROM A PETSTORE! NEVER!!
3. So many people choose to only present one side of a story. They choose to focus on the negative or what is wrong rather than discuss both what's wrong and what's right. This is true of the following:  Blackfish, Sea World, and zoos, Planned Parenthood, law enforcement, the military, gun control. I could go on. If you're going to spout off at the mouth about anything you should at least present a balanced, well-researched, opinion rather than resort to extremes and name calling. 
4. Family. Family is not blood or legal relationships. Family is based on actions. We need a new word for it so that I can refer to the people to whom I am related by blood by a separate name. Very few of my relations support me, help me, or even know me on any real level. If you do, you know who you are. Just because you married someone and now have 20 kids who I have never even met, this does not make them my family and I have very little interest in them. You're on your 4th marriage to an individual that I barely know. This doesn't make them my family just because they have the legal title of "uncle" or "aunt". The opposite is also true:  Just because you got divorced doesn't automatically mean that I no longer consider your ex my family. I probably sound heartless or whatever, but it's the truth of how I feel. I have 1st cousins I've never met. I wouldn't know them if I passed them on the street. Why should I consider them "family"? I'm really interested in hearing other opinions here.
5. Respect is earned. Being an adult, being a grandparent, being a teacher doesn't automatically entitle you to someone's respect. If you want to be respected, act like a responsible, caring, contributing citizen. 
6. My kids are my kids. I have absolutely no regard for your opinion as to how my husband and I have raised them. Which, by the way, we did on our own, away from people to whom we are related, and with very little support from anyone except for our neighbors who became our friends. Yes, this was a result of our choice to be a military family, but it makes it no less true.
7. Humans were not meant to be vegetarians. If this were so, we would have evolved without teeth designed for ripping and chewing meat and the digestive system to process meat. Stop being all superior because you've chosen to go against nature. And stop trying to make your cat into a vegetarian. Cats were not born with the digestive system to process fruits and vegetables. They are strictly carnivores. Deal with it.
8. As omnivores and creatures ingenious to Earth, humans are a natural part of the planet's ecosystem. It's not as if we're an invasive species from another planet. Geez.
9. If you hunt animals, you should use every part of the animal. Trophy hunting has no place in my world. I think trophy hunting is disgusting and, frankly, a coward's hobby. Luring an animal out with food and then shooting it with a crossbow or gun. Yeah. That means you've got some real balls. 
10. Stop complaining about the weather where you live. I'm so freaking sick to death of listening to people complain about cold winters when they live in the north. Conversely, I'm tired of listening to my fellow Floridians complain about our hot, humid summer. YOU LIVE IN FREAKING FLORIDA!!! WHAT THE HOLY EFF DO YOU EXPECT?!?!?! If you hate it so much MOVE! At the very least, shut up about it.
11. Do you know how many naturalized Americans that we know that abhor illegal aliens? These naturalized citizens worked hard and overcame personal obstacles and bureaucratic red tape to become legal citizens and then sit and watch their illegal counterparts receive American benefits for crossing our boarders illegally. No. I don't support illegal aliens in the United States.
12. There is a difference between "stepping up" and "being a man" and being an idiot and allowing yourself to be taken advantage of. Your "family" that "supports" your decision is doing you a disservice. Everyone really needs to stop kidding themselves here. 
13. If you've never had a driver's license, you really need to stuff it about other people's driving.
14. When it comes to food and picky eating, you're not doing yourself any favors when you won't try something just because of its color and how it looks. You're also not playing it very smart when you travel to places with unique cuisines and then eat a hamburger. Unless you traveled to Texas. (I edited this one so it sounds nicer than it actually was when it was in my head.)
15. Stop putting your drama on Facebook.
16. Stop getting all your information from Facebook. 
17. Stop having McOpinions and actually do some research from varied sources, not just ones that support your beliefs. 
18. I play MMOs, I read books (romances, literature, urban fantasy, YA, historical fiction, high fantasy, science fiction, classics, and more), I listen to Alt Nation on XM, I watch scifi shows, feel good movies, and old sitcoms on Netflix, and I watch booktube, gaming vids, and makeup vids on YouTube. I'm a huge nerd/geek/introvert. I use the Oxford comma. Despite what you may think because of what you're reading here, I'm a nice person. I care about people and I'm always willing to lend an ear. However, I won't blow smoke up your ass if I think you're being dumb. Don't ask me for my opinion if you don't want to hear the truth.
19. We have three cats, one dog, one guinea pig, and a saltwater fish tank. I love all of my pets more than you. But I love my kids and my husband most of all.
20. Lastly, I'd like to thank everyone that came down to Florida last year when our house flooded and we lost 75% of everything we owned to help us out. We had to sort through our entire house of stuff and decide what could be saved, what needed to be cleaned, what needed to be moved to storage, and what needed to be thrown away and replaced. We then had to load up these respective collections. They either had to be set aside for professional cleaners, dragged out to the curb for Waste Management, or moved into storage. We moved everything we owned from inside our flooded home to our garage and then to a storage unit. Then, when we were finally able to move back in after weeks of essentially being homeless, we have to move everything back into the house. This was a lot of physical labor moving a four bedroom house...twice and it cost us a lot of money outside of what the insurance paid to the point where we're still getting caught up financially and our garage is still a mess. The help and support was...something else and we hope to have the opportunity to reciprocate in kind in the future.

September Favorites

I say this every month. Heck, I say this just about every day, time is going by so fast. I can't believe October is here and it's time to get ready for the holiday season.

We lost all of our Fall/Autumn/Harvest/Halloween decorations in the flood so we have to shop for new stuff this year. This is the second time I've had to replace these decorations. The first time, movers lost our box. Maybe the universe is trying to tell me something. 

September was rather uneventful if I stop and think about it. Lots of job searching going on for both myself and the Mister. His official last day as an active duty Marine is today, September 30th. We're still figuring out health insurance, retirement pay, VA benefits, etc. Making this transition is daunting to say the least. Anyway...

Books and TV

Persepolis by Marjane Satrapi is by far, my favorite read for September. I remember when this graphic novel was first published and EVERYone was talking about it. I read the synopsis out of curiosity and didn't like the sound of it at all. It sounded all political and dull. This year, I decided to read it for Banned Books Week and because I'm trying to find graphic novels that I like. I love this. Persepolis is a story that is going to stay with me a really long time. 

It's about an Iranian girl and her family and how they experienced, lived, and survived the Islamic Revolutions. It's a first person memoir told from Marjane's perspective from the ages of six to fourteen. As an American, I see the news reports on the Middle East and the places that we are bombing and the terrorists that we're fighting against and it makes it very easy to forget that normal people and families have to live this life. Marjane tells her story without any "woe is me" despite the hardships and losses she and her family experienced. Can you imagine being a teenager in the early 80's and being assaulted for wearing a jean jacket with a Michael Jackson button on it? If that had been happening here in America at the same time, just about every teenager would have been accosted on the street. Marjane brings these realities to life in her memoir and makes her experiences relatable to all her readers. 

I also remember thumbing through this novel ten years ago and not being very impressed with the artwork. You have to read the story to appreciate the artwork that goes along with it. I can be a real numskull sometimes. The artwork, in its black and white simplicity, is poignant and portrays the emotions of the characters and the starkness of living in a city under attack without taking your focus away from the words. 

As for TV, basically, I got caught up on The Big Bang Theory and watched its season premier and watched the season premier of The Goldbergs. Frankly, TV holds very little interest for me these days unless I'm watching old sitcom reruns on Netflix. Since we've been back in our house, we've probably watched less than 24 hours of new TV. Not counting sports and news. I really wonder why we continue to pay for cable.

Health and Beauty


After many years of looking, I have found a liquid foundation that I can actually stand to wear! It's L'Oreal's Magic Nude Liquid Powder Bare Skin Perfecting Makeup SPF 18. It's a medium coverage foundation that applies very easily with a brush and feels so lightweight. It comes out of the bottle as a liquid and dries to a powdery finish. I LURRRVE it! I also love, love, love my Tarte Smooth Operator Finishing Powder, which I apply on top of my foundation and the combo leaves my skin feeling soft and smooth. There are other liquid to powder foundations out there that I plan on trying just to see if they're any better than a drug store brand, but I'm pretty happy with this one.

The Internets

Another booktuber I'd like to tell you all about is Sanne from booksandquills. Sanne is fantastic. It really helps that I don't think I have completely disagreed with any of her book reviews that I've watched so far. Also, she can be so funny. She's originally from the Netherlands and occasionally, she'll do a video on Dutch "speakwords" and I find them very entertaining. Sanne is living the life that I want, in London working at a book publishing company, so I hate her just a little bit. Don't let that stop you from checking out her channel.

Food and Drink

I have to tell you all about another wine that the Mister and I discovered at the Vine. It's the Grand Barossa Cabernet Sauvignon. Omg people! This is such a great wine. "Lifted aromas of blackcurrant, blackberry and vanilla are accompanied by vibrant, dark berry fruits on the palate. The finish is long with fine-grained tannins from sixteen months maturation in a combination of new and older French oak hogsheads. Although drinking well now this wine may be cellared for up to ten years from vintage." I love the blueberry notes in this wine. Yum. This is such a good wine, that the Vine can't keep it in stock. I have no idea where you can buy this wine. Sorry. A "specialist" at www.wine.com says this wine is similar and this wine too but I haven't tried either so I can't say one way or the other.

A Review of MateVana Herbal Tea

This post is a little different for my blog. I don't think I've ever reviewed a tea before and this is more or less a reference for me so that I can remember my first impressions of this tea. My memory isn't what it used to be, lol. I've probably reviewed a tea and just can't remember and I'm too lazy to look.

I had a tea haul from Teavana delivered yesterday. This is probably one of the most missed stores that I miss from San Diego. There are some things that you should buy in person rather than over the internet and loose leaf teas are definitely something that you should buy in person. I really hate Teavana's high-pressure sales techniques, but seeing and smelling loose leaf tea in person is a great experience. When you live in the boonies, what are ya gonna do?

I loved the sound of the description of this tea from Teavana's website:

It’s not coffee, is it tea? Taste this coffee-like maté and red rooibos blend. Sweetened with cocoa and chocolate chips, this mochaccino inspired blend infuses smooth, dark rich sips that are soft and robust. 
Roasted infusion with rich chocolaty overtones

A palmful of MateVana Tea. You can see the marigold and chocolate chunks clearly.

This Mate tea has a bit of caffeine in it and I love a tea that I can drink in place of a morning cup of coffee because some days, I'm just not in a coffee mood but can use an energy boost. This is a very aromatic tea with strong chocolate overtones and nutty undertones. It has a strong tea flavor with chocolaty/nutty flavors. I think it also has a bit of a light anise taste to it as well. Something that bothers me about this tea is that I can swear that I'm tasting an artificial sweetener but it isn't listed in the ingredients. I would almost put money on this tea having an artificial sweetener in it.The ingredients do list sugar and "artificial flavors" soooo... Despite the troubling sweetener taste, I have enjoyed this tea this morning. While the chocolate comes through very strongly, I would not compare this tea to a mochaccino. It's just not what I think of when drinking this tea. It's very tea-y versus having a coffee flavor. It's also something that I would rather drink on a cold morning and/or evening rather than a hot and humid morning like we had today at my house. 

Very dark brew. It looks like coffee but tastes like tea.

Esther Ehrlich: Nest

Disclaimer:  I was given a free copy of this book by the publisher for my honest review. Everything written below is my honest opinion and of my own free will.

Title:  Nest

Author:  Esther Ehrlich

Publisher: Random House Children's Books

Pages:  336

Genre:  Middle school fiction

Setting:  Cape Cod in 1972

Where did you get it? This is an ARC from Netgalley.

Why did you read it? If I remember correctly, I was invited to read this book. That being said, I read it because I liked the sound of the book from the blurb. I also thought the cover was pretty.

From the publisher:  For fans of Jennifer Holm (Penny from Heaven, Turtle in Paradise), a heartfelt and unforgettable middle-grade novel about an irresistible girl and her family, tragic change, and the healing power of love and friendship. In 1972 home is a cozy nest on Cape Cod for eleven-year-old Naomi “Chirp” Orenstein, her older sister, Rachel; her psychiatrist father; and her dancer mother. But then Chirp’s mom develops symptoms of a serious disease, and everything changes.
   Chirp finds comfort in watching her beloved wild birds. She also finds a true friend in Joey, the mysterious boy who lives across the street. Together they create their own private world and come up with the perfect plan: Escape. Adventure. Discovery.
   Nest is Esther Ehrlich’s stunning debut novel. Her lyrical writing is honest, humorous, and deeply affecting. Chirp and Joey will steal your heart. Long after you finish Nest, the spirit of Chirp and her loving family will stay with you.

What did you think? I loved this book. I had reservations about reading a book intended for such a young audience, but Esther Ehrlich doesn't "write down" to her readers. I thoroughly enjoyed every page of Nest. This books was full of "feels" and normally, I'm not into that. While Chirp and her family deals with illness, which is a serious subject, you aren't left with a heavy feeling after reading Nest. Quite the opposite. 

I absolutely fell in love with all of the characters in this book, even the sometimes annoying psychiatrist dad. This family is so real because they are a family in the very real sense of the word but they aren't perfect either. Ehrlich's writing is so spot on that you identify with their angst, but it's their perfection that makes you completely feel their losses. 

For a debut novel, well, you can't even tell this is a debut novel. It's really amazing and I am so a fan of Esther Ehrlich. I can't wait to see what she publishes in the future. I am also totally buying a copy of this book when it comes out so that my kids can read it. 

You can read the intro to Nest by clicking on the author's name above and visiting her website. Click on the book cover to head on over to B&N to preorder.

Faux Autumn Day

You know when you wake up to a day that is completely gloomy? It's all dark and gray and the clouds look heavy and ominous.Without checking the weather or stepping outside, you just know that it must be chilly outside and so you lay in bed just a couple minutes longer anticipating a cozy day filled with tea, warm socks, and a good book.

This is just the morning that I had. Oh! But wait! It was gloomy and dark and drizzly outside however this is FLORIDA and it's still almost 90 degrees outside. What does dark, gloomy, drizzle mean in Florida? Not only is it hot, but the drizzle adds to the humidity. ::sigh::

I didn't indulge in fuzzy socks, jeans, and a sweatshirt (not wanting to die of heat exhaustion) but I did haul out my tea. Oh tea! How I missed you! First, I made a tumbler of a peach blended tea. After guzzling that down, I made a tumbler of seven berry sangria rooibos and blackberry mojito green tea blend. I'm also drinking my tea out of my favorite teacup. Do you enjoy teas?

I'm also indulging in my book and books in general today. I'm currently reading Oryx and Crake by Margaret Atwood. I had a really hard time getting into this one but I'm finding it interesting now that I'm smack dab in the middle of it. It's definitely different from what I normally read. As for as "books in general" goes, I got myself organized to do a Goodreads challenge called The Seasonal Reading Challenge. I know that I'm not good at these things, but this is so different with so many varied tasks that you can pick and choose from, that I want to give it a try. Plus, the challenge runs for the entirety of the Fall season, Sept 1 - Nov 30 so I'll have a lot of time to play. You all should give it a look see if you need something to do with your time.