Dear Jason Good

I feel so strongly about this that I've had a hard time not harping over it the past couple of days. It would seriously help if Jason Good would stop tweeting/posting about it too. ;) Just saying. So this is my rebuttal to Jason's post on his blog. By the way, I find Jason hilarious. You should totally read his posts on fruits and vegetables. I don't disparage him as a person, writer, or man in general, but I totally disagree with his point of view on this subject. That being said, I will continue to read his blog because I find it entertaining. I hope we can agree to disagree. Side note:  I apologize in advance for the language. I don't think the f word has ever made an appearance on my blog before today. So without further ado...

Dear Jason,

I would first like to address your tweet from Thursday where you said, "If you don't have kids, you're opinion about the Times Magazine cover can go fuck itself." I replied yesterday but I would like to add one more thing:  In my opinion, if you're not a woman or the father of said child, you should have next to no opinion about breast feeding unless you have an Oedipal complex.

Now as to your blog post from today...

You said, "Think about how you might feel if, instead of a boy, the cover showed that same mother breast feeding a 3-year-old girl...It's different isn't it?" No. Not even a little bit. For me, this issue isn't with the gender of the child at all but with the age of the child. I don't look at that picture and see a sexualized (is that a word?) picture of a little boy breast feeding. I see a child who can walk, talk, feed himself, is most likely potty trained, who will be starting preschool incredibly soon (if he hasn't already) and who is old enough to ask for a snack, or in his case, a boob. Once a kid gets to an age where he can feed himself and understand his mom when she tells him to stop biting her, it's time to put the breasts away.

Next you asked how people would have felt if the appearance of the child had been different, would we, the public, feel different about the photo. My answer is that if the kid had been in a diaper, I would have questioned why an almost four-year-old kid isn't potty trained.

Then you said, and this is where you really lost me, that the photographer had the boy standing on a stool in front of his mom because of his height. Come on! No he didn't. He had both of them standing because that, in and of itself, made the photo even more shocking. Is that how his mom feeds him in the privacy of their own home? I mean, is she standing in her kitchen doing the dishes with her boob hanging out and the kid hanging on, standing on a stool? Probably not. I'll go out on a limb and make an assumption here and say that if the mom had been cradling her son in her lap and feeding him or in another "natural", affectionate, respectable position, it wouldn't have garnered as sensational a reaction as it did with the mom, her clothing, and the boy positioned in the way that they were. Irregardless of my opinion, the stool had NOTHING to do with the boy's height. And your eye is way off. Minus the stool, the kid would have been sucking somewhere in her abdominal area which is a whole other issue (meaning concern, not magazine issue).

I will concede your point that everyone's feelings on this picture and the issue of attachment parenting are highly subjective. I object to your use of the word "puritanical" however. That's off-base. By using the word "puritanical" you imply that people opposed to attachment parenting and breast feeding teenagers (I exaggerate) are just uptight which isn't the case. Every comment that I've seen, read, or heard on this story is on par with my own. Then again, going by your rationalization, the people that I tweet and Facebook with, my friends and family would all be Puritans anyway and that's why we have the same opinions. FYI, a poll that the Today Show conducted showed that 73% of people didn't like the photo with only 27% agreeing with it. Not scientific, I know, but they're not people I know on any level that I'm aware.

I worry about the long term effects on this poor kid who could NOT POSSIBLY even come close to understanding what it means to have his picture on the cover of Time freaking magazine sucking on his mother's boob. Agree or disagree, that kid is going to get made fun of on the playground. Anyone who thinks differently is living in a sunshine, kitty, fantasy land. I asked my 13 year old daughter her opinion this morning and she replied, "Why would his mother do that to him?" Why indeed. He will get made fun of, I have no doubt. I am also unaware of studies conducted on kids who were breast fed past a certain age. Someone needs to do one though, I'd be highly interested in the results.

Lastly, if that woman had been an unattractive woman instead of a pretty, thin, blonde, we wouldn't be having this debate because they would never have put her on the cover in the first place.

I could do a whole other post about attachment parenting but I'm not going to do so. I will say one thing on that subject because I apparently like to open myself to criticism. I think attachment parenting is more about the parent and less about the needs of the child. So there. 

That's my two cents for what it's worth.

P.S.

I am the mother of a 13 year old and almost 16 year old. I breast fed both of my daughters. I understand that bonding experience and I'm aware of the health benefits of breast feeding. I also understand and applaud women who choose to do what's best for them and their babies even if that means that they didn't breast feed for whatever reason.

May 11, 2012: Five Question Friday

 1. What advice would you give a couple getting married?

Honesty and trust are #1. If you don't have it, you don't have a solid foundation for your marriage. Make sure that you're marrying someone you'd call your best friend. I also like something that I've seen around Pinterest which is, is the man you're with the image of the son you hope you have someday. Picture yourself when you're old and gray and retired. Do you see yourself sitting on a front porch swing with the man you're with beside you?

2. If you could tell your 16 year old self ONE thing, what would it be?

Lighten up.

3. What do you do to keep cool in the summer? (AC, windows, fans, swimming, etc.)

We run the AC, of course, but we'll also hang out at the coast where it's usually significantly cooler than inland. 

4. What did you (or your wife) crave most while pregnant?

I can only remember having cravings with my first pregnancy and I craved sweet and sour soup.

5. Who is your favorite TV mom? Why?

Probably Claire Huxtable. She was beautiful, smart, and successful. She could sing, dance, and speak Spanish. I agreed with most of her parenting ideals. She was fair and loving to her kids but when they deserved it, she could be a force. And her kids respected her. I also really love Kristina Braverman from Parenthood. I can relate to her being the mom of a special needs kid.

You Can Love Your Cat...

...but just don't love your cat. Know what movie that's from?

Anyway, after yesterday's rather intense post, I thought I'd lighten things up a bit with a post about my cat. I kinda got the feeling that nobody knows what to do with yesterday's post anyway. I had an enormous spike in page views but only one comment. Wondering if people are going to be afraid to be around me now...

Bailey and Kit-ten snoozing together

I have morning "Scratch and Purr" sessions with my cat. It's not dirty, you filthy-minded people. This is where he...Wait a minute. I never told you about how she is a he.

::Side Story::

We sorta rescued this cat from a shelter, meaning, we took him before his previous owner gave him up for various reasons. She had taken him to the vet for his kitten checkup and was told he was a female. If you didn't know this, it can be hard to tell the sex of a kitten. So, we got "Sophie" thinking he was female and he even came with a pink bed. The pink bed plus assurances from a vet, we never thought to question the cat's femininity.

Fast forward a few weeks and we started noticing changes. "She" was definitely not a she. So, Sophie became Shelly (named after Sheldon on The Big Bang Theory) and we still have a hard time with the pronouns because we were calling him a her for so long. To save us the grief, we call the cat Kit-ten and all is good.

::End Side Story::

...he jumps in my lap and stands on my stomach or chest or neck (breathing isn't as important as a good chin scratch) and wants to be scratched every morning all the while purring like an engine and drooling. Yes, he drools. And you have to scratch him with both hands. If I try to check my e-mail or Facebook on my phone with one hand and scratch his chin with the other, he gets pissy and tries to knock my phone out of my hand. Eventually, he'll settle down and lay on me for a while. This has become my favorite time of the day.

He is just the best cat ever. I know a lot of people don't like cats because they assume they're all standoffish, but Kit-ten isn't like that at all. He loves to be around people and he's just funny to boot.

Yesterday, he got in the living room window, stood up on his hind legs, and started clawing at the glass. Turns out there was a bunny in the yard and it was just driving him crazy. I also found him lying in Plantweed's pot yesterday afternoon. I had to evict Kit-ten from the window cubby to make room for the plant and he's not having it at all. Also, every time we go to the freezer to get ice for a drink, he comes and stands up at the fridge. This is because he expects you to drop him a piece of ice so that he can play with it. And I mean every time he hears us getting ice. He also likes to splash in his water dish and steal stuffed animals and "kill" them. One of his other favorite things is to hide and blankets and then attack Bailey. He's a riot. Here's a short video of him killing the Oldest Child's monkey that he stole out of her room.

I Can't Belive I'm Posting This

Warning:  Extra long post. I hope you'll feel it's worth it to read to the end.

I have read lots of books. I’ve been reading for 30 years so I can only imagine how many books I’ve read over that amount of time. I couldn’t even guess and I’ve tried. It’s the only constant I’ve ever had in my life. People come and go, houses and towns come and go, whatever. But I’ve always had books. There are many things in my life and in this world that I will never understand but at the top of the list are people that don’t like to read. I. Do. Not. Get. That. What the frack (is that supposed to be ck) is my point???

I just finished reading Jenny Lawson’s Let’s Pretend This Never Happened (A Mostly True Memoir). I’ve also been reading her blog, Twitter, and Facebook for a few months so I’m familiar with her writing. I have never before so connected and related to a book in the way that I have Jenny’s book. Considering that she has a generalized anxiety disorder and owns several taxidermied “pets”, some people might raise an eyebrow at me for that sentence. But it’s very true nonetheless.

I don’t have a generalized anxiety disorder but I do have social anxiety and an overwhelming fear of making mistakes. That probably has a technical term but I don't know what it is. I was also what was termed as “painfully shy” as a child and thanks to Jenny’s book and my therapist, I’ve realized that I’ve had this anxiety for as long as I can remember. I always say that I hate people but actually, I just hate being in social situations. I never know what to say and the few times that the Mister and I go to parties, I sit on some stranger’s couch and watch the clock until I can go home again. My anxiety isn’t as bad as Jenny’s as she would hide in the bathroom at cocktail parties until etiquette would allow her to go home. My anxiety isn’t debilitating (not completely), just frustrating, embarrassing, and personally painful (although my therapist says I’m one slippery step away from agoraphobia and she’s amazed that I don’t have panic attacks.) When I go shopping, for example, standing in line waiting to pay is torture. By the time I get home, I have a migraine, my hands and feet are swollen, and I can feel that my blood pressure is too high. I feel this way every time I’m around people, even friends and family that I’ve known all my life. It’s why I sit with an accent pillow in my lap or my arms crossed across my stomach if there’s no available pillow. If I’m out in public, I hold my purse (thank goodness for large bags!!) in front of me. Eventually, if I’m around someone long enough, I can relax back to normal but it usually takes longer than a normal social encounter takes. It sucks. Maybe, if you know me, you're thinking that I'm making all this up. But I do my best to avoid socializing and make excuses all the time. Besides, after almost 35 years of being like this, I can hide it sometimes. I can wear a "normal" facade when the occasion calls for it. I’m attempting to work through my plethora of issues with psychotherapy, holding off on meds as a last resort. My new mantra has become, “We’re all humans. We all make mistakes.” I’m not kidding. I say this to myself several times a day. I’m hoping that one day I’ll believe that it actually applies to me.

Jenny’s book has also made me feel normal about how hard Hannah’s loss has been to the Mister, kids, and me. She lost her dog too and said in her book how she still has a hard time writing about it. It’s been almost a year since Hannah passed and I still can’t talk about it. I’m having a hard time not crying as I type this. If I talk about her out loud, I have to think about something else while I do so or I’ll break down. Until today, I felt like I was overreacting or something was just wrong with me. She was just a dog after all. But now I know I’m not the only one who has mourned the loss of a pet so deeply because I too, “loved that damn dog.”

Another chapter was about how she gets lost easily. That is so me!!! I get lost all the freaking time. In the mall, when I go into a store and then come back out, I have no idea which direction I was walking in before I went into the store. When I drive somewhere, pull in and park, when I leave again, I get confused as to which direction I need to turn leaving the parking lot. GPS WAS MADE FOR ME! Except for the fact that our new GPS is a freaking Mexican. And I’m not being racist. She pronounces Los Angeles, Los Ahnhalace. That’s the phonetic spelling. She also says, “8 West 5 South” for 805 south. She’s freaking confusing and sometimes no help at all. That crazy biatch is going to get me lost in the barrio one day, I just know it. (The barrio, for those of you not in the know, is a low-income neighborhood in San Diego where they have bars on the doors and windows. As a white lady, I don’t want to get lost there.) My lack of a sense of direction makes it so that I never want to go anywhere. I don’t like driving with people in the car because I’m afraid of how judgy they’ll be when I get all turned around. This goes back to my “afraid of making mistakes in front of people disorder”. It makes me feel like a child. A sense of direction isn’t just something that you can make yourself learn either. It wouldn’t be called “sense” if it were. And you will never understand where I’m coming from if you have a developed sense of direction just like I will never understand what it’s like to have one. It’s the same way in which a man will never understand the pain of being in labor and giving birth and a woman will never understand how much it hurts being kicked in the balls. (Sorry for the word “balls”.)

I don’t want you to think that this book was all dead animals and panic attacks. There were parts that I laughed at so hard that my family looked at me like I had lost my mind and then I had to read those parts aloud so that they could laugh with me. I would like to tell everyone to read this book but I can’t think of any men that I know that could possibly or would appreciate all the vagina talk. One of Jenny’s favorite words is the “f word” and I also know quite a few people that wouldn’t appreciate that either. (The Youngest child is reading this over my shoulder and criticizing my choice of font. Really?!?!?)

Anyway, I know quite a few of my blogger friends who have this book on their “to be read list”. DON’T PUT IT OFF!! Read it now! You won’t be sorry. Pay special attention to the chapter titled, “Making Friends with Girls”. It’s about Jenny and her blogger friends. It speaks to me too as I’m sure it will you as well.

Thanks for sticking with me to the end of this post. I know it was really long and rambly.

And one last thing…the next time you go to a party and see a girl sitting on the couch by herself, don’t think that she’s too snooty to socialize with everyone. Maybe she’s just too painfully anxious to talk to people. Social anxiety does not equal snobby. Go read this book!

No Plant vs Weed This Week

Plantweed has been decimated by snails and I'm pissed. No picture this week. I can't bear it. I decided to bring him inside which means that now I have to worry he won't get enough sun because I hardly get any sun inside my house. I have him in the kitchen window cubby thing and that means I had to evict the cat. I also have to worry that he won't get enough water because I always forget to water my plants. I'm beginning to think that I'm just not meant to grow anything other than cacti and succulents. It's depressing.

In other news...

Is anyone watching HBO's new show, Girls? I'm too old by about 13 years to be watching this show but I really like it. It's quirky and very Sex in the City-esque despite what the show's creator says. Instead of women in their 30s and 40s, it's girls in their 20s. I love Hannah. She has such a dry sense of humor and she also epitomizes what is wrong with today's teens and 20-somethings...that belief that they're entitled to everything instead of having to actually work for what they want. Anyway, I hope people are watching so that HBO brings it back for a second season.

And this time last year, the Mister and I were on our anniversary vaca in Paso Robles. ::sigh:: I could use another vacation. We don't have any big plans for our anniversary this year. We're going to do something that involves drinking our bottle of Merlot that Rotta Winery gifted us last year and that we were saving to drink this year. Pretty excited about that. It was an award winning vintage.

April 27, 2012: Five Question Friday

1. Do you make your kids finish all the food on their plates?
No. A very emphatic NO. I don't force feed my kids. I do have rules though. They have to at least try everything I serve them. They aren't allowed to say that they don't like something they've never tried. If they don't finish their food, they don't get an after dinner snack or dessert. If you're not hungry enough to eat dinner, then you're not hungry enough to eat junk. (You can't have any pudding if you don't eat your meat.)

2. Do you give an allowance?
Yes. We give an allowance to our kids based on their age and what they contribute to their home.
 
3. Do you actually park your car in the garage?
Heck no. Our garage is barely big enough to fit our junk in let alone our junk and a car. 
 
4. What is one food you will NEVER cook?
Veal or lamb. I don't eat nor would I cook baby animals. Or rabbit. I have rabbits as pets. I don't eat them.
 
5. Do you have anything exciting planned for the summer?

Nope. We'll take our annual trip to Sea World but other than that, no plans. No trips planned and I don't think anyone has plans to visit us either. 

Plant vs Weed: Week 6...And Other Stuff

There's not much to report on Plantweed this week. Still growing and being eaten by snails. Plantweed did get a nice soaking last night though. We had a good amount of rain come through the area, which was nice. Here's a picture that I took yesterday, April 25th.

In other news...

I just finished one of the most painful classes I've ever taken. It was called Shakespeare Power and Justice or something to that effect. I'm not a fan, nor have I ever been, of Shakespeare. I can read it, understand it, and appreciate it as classic literary works but I would never read Shakespeare for "fun". To make matters worse, I had to argue why I think Shakespeare is still relevant enough to have a place in today's high school curriculum. I'm not so sure how much I actually believe that. The language is obscure, the themes are outdated (I managed to argue very convincingly that they aren't ;)) and I think the time spent on teaching and interpreting his plays could be better spent elsewhere. Like teaching teenagers that "ur", "okaay", "kk", and "fuk" are not correct spellings and when to use their, there, they're, its, it's, and other commonly misused and misspelled words. Ironically enough, the play that I think has the most modern relevance is Coriolanus and it's one of Shakespeare's most obscure plays that has only been produced as a play and/or movie a handful of times. Ralph Fiennes directed and starred in the movie last year as a matter of fact. Did you know that? I didn't until I started doing some research. It was so "popular" that it has made less than $700,000 since it's release in the U.S.

Anyway, I'm glad that class is over and that I have fulfilled that requirement and never have to take another Shakespeare class again. Thank you very much!

And FYI...

I'm thinking of imparting the importance of using your turn signal by accosting drivers, ripping out the turn signal handle in their car and shoving it in a very specific place that they won't forget that it's there.

I'm also thinking about driving around my neighborhood until I find the yapping dog that is left outside to freaking yap at 6 o freaking clock in the gosh freaking morning and kicking its owner until it stops yapping.

I have anger issues this week. I need to live on some remote mountain somewhere that's accessible only by helicopter so that I can't get away from inconsiderate people.

Military Wife Meme

I found this blog hopping the other day. I thought it made good filler.

How did you and your spouse meet?
We met in 1995 after being set up by my ex-sister-in-law. She and the Mister used to work together.

How old were you when you two met?
We were both 17.

How long have you been together?
We officially started dating April of 1995. We'll be celebrating our 16th wedding anniversary in May.

Where are you and your spouse originally from?
We're both from Ohio. Not the same town though.

How did you feel about him joining the military?
At first I was against it. I didn't like the thought of him going off for 13 weeks for very tough training. We had a 14 month old at the time. It was tough. Eventually, I came around. Looking back, it was the best choice for us.

Where did your spouse go to Basic Training?
Parris Island, SC

Has your spouse ever been deployed?
Yeah. He's been to Japan and Afghanistan.

Ever been to his promotion ceremony?
Umm. I'm trying to think. I've been to several ceremonies over the years but I honestly can't remember if one of them was for a promotion.

How long have you been a military wife?
This September, it will be 15 years. Geez.

Did you marry him before or after he joined?
Before.

How did your husband propose?
He simply asked and I said yes.

Where did you get married?
The courthouse in Marion, Ohio.

How old were you two when you got married?
We were both 18. Young'uns.

Did he wear his uniform on your wedding day?
He wasn't a Marine yet, so no. We probably wouldn't have done the whole military wedding anyway.

Where are you and your spouse currently stationed?
MCAS Miramar in San Diego, CA.

Do you live on base?
We live in military housing but it's not on base. We've actually never lived on any base.

How long were you married when you had to go through your first separation?
Well, if we're going to count boot camp, we would have been married for two years by that time. If we're going to go by his first deployment, that would be after six years of marriage. He's been gone for so many different types of training over 15 years that I can't remember it all.

What is your favorite base so far?
My all time favorite base is MCB Camp Lejeune. It is the epitome of a Marine Corps base in my opinion. One time, I was driving along and all the sudden I start hearing explosions and I'm trying not to freak out. Then I see a sign for the grenade practice area, lol. We've only been stationed at two different bases over the years:  Miramar and Cherry Point. I liked them both for different reasons.

Does your spouse look good in his uniform?
Lol. Yes. I feel fortunate to be married to a man in uniform.

Do you think military life is more advanced than civilian life?
No. Just because we maybe experience more things or different things or live more places doesn't mean that military life is more advanced. I think the mere fact that the military is steeped in tradition and are usually the very last group of people to give up antiquated ideals makes us behind the times if anything. Military life may be tougher in some regards, that's for sure.

Do you like the benefits you receive as a military dependent?
I liked them a lot better 15 years ago before the DoD started whittling away at them. But yes, I like shopping at the commissary and being able to buy discounted tickets on base. I like going to Sea World once a year for free. I like having free movers. Tricare is, sadly, better than most other health insurance. It's better than my sister's who is a nurse. Explain that one. I suppose base housing is a benefit but I have a love/hate relationship with housing. So, yes.

Do you have a lot of military wife friends?
Not so much anymore. I have one neighbor that I'm friendly with but we're not confidants. Most of my friends are former military spouses. I have 2 or 3 military wives that I call friends. I don't get out much anymore, lol.

What is the hardest part of being a military wife?
Boy! This answer sure has changed a lot over the years. Recruiting duty would be at the top of the list by and far. That's only three years though. For the entire 15, being taken for granted as a built in babysitter is probably what I'm most resentful about.

Do you own any military wife stuff?
What's this supposed to mean? I don't have any stickers on my car. The only t-shirts I have are leftovers from recruiting duty and I consider them my "grubby day" t-shirts. I do have my Marine Corps jacket and sweatpants that I bought at Parris Island when the Mister graduated. The jacket still looks like new even though it survived three extremely harsh Vermont winters. The sweatpants have seen better days, lol. I have a D-ring keychain. OH! And I have a sign on my front door that says, "Home is where the Marine Corps Sends Us". I think that probably counts as "military wife stuff".

Do you support your spouse as a member of the military?
This is a dumb question. Then again, I know plenty of wives who have threatened divorce if their husbands reenlist. So, yes. I support my husband. I go where the Marine Corps sends him and do my best to overlook all the other bullshit.

April 20, 2012: Five Question Friday

1. Groceries are high right now what is easiest way you have found to cut back?

We don't do a whole lot of cutting back when it comes to groceries. If we need to cut back on the money that we spend on our total food bill, we stop eating out. I try doing the coupon thing every once in a while but I forget to use them more often than not. Something we used to do way back when the Mister was a PFC and then a Lance Corporal, we used to gather all the circulars from the local grocery stores. Then we would write down all the deals that they were having on items we wanted to buy. Then we would go to the commissary and compare prices. I would say that about 75% of the time or more, the commissary is cheaper. If there was something cheaper at another store though, we'd go grab it. Sometimes, this meant we shopped at 3-5 different stores. Albertsons has good deals on soda that the commissary rarely has though. Back then, this would have been 1999-2001 at the latest, gas prices were way cheaper than they are now so I don't even know if the minor savings would make up for the extra gas nowadays. 

2. What are the top 3 things on your "bucket list"?

• Move to Europe. Italy, England, Ireland, or Scotland are my top choices but not necessarily in that order.
• Get my Master's.
• Visit Yosemite.

 P.S. Those aren't necessarily my top 3 but rather what I could come up with offhand.

3. Would you rather give up AC or heat?

I've gone without both of these at one time or another. I would have to say I'd rather live without the AC. While this can be miserable, we've lost power in the middle of winter once in Vermont. It was actually a winter storm that knocked out the power. That was scary. I'll take miserable over scary.

4. What's your favorite cocktail??

Lychee Girl!!!! Then I would say Sangria (does Sangria count as a cocktail?), Mojito, Moscow Mule, and a Cosmo. In that order.

5. What was your first job & how old were you?

My first job was selling sweatshirts at a kiosk in the mall. I was 16 I think. Maybe 17 but I'm thinking 16. 

Plant vs Weed: Week 5

Snails are my nemesis. I've tried espresso and now eggshells and neither seem to be much of a deterrent at all. The day after I put eggs shells in two different pots, I go outside about 7:15 in the morning and there are snails hanging off my plants and SITTING on the shells. WTF?!?! The Mister finds this hilarious that snails are kicking my butt. But they seriously eating Plantweed. Grr! The next thing I'm going to try is copper wire. That is, if I can find it. Supposedly I can get copper wire at a craft store. We'll see. It's supposed to shock the snails, heheheh. Little devils.

Anyway, here's the latest picture of Plantweed taken on April 19th.

If you click on the picture to make it bigger, you can actually see the snail damage. You can also very clearly see my worthless eggshell barrier. I'm peeved. I also just noticed that I was a little too close to the pot for this picture. Sorry about that.

April 13, 2012: Five Question Friday

1. Who mows your grass?

 

It depends really. It first started out being the Oldest child's chore but she did such an incredibly lazy, lousy job at it, that she got fired. Then it became the Mister's chore. Now, he and I kind of share it. I used to refuse to do yard work because the way I figure it, I do the laundry, dust and vacuum, do the dishes, clean the bathrooms, etc., etc., so why the hell should I have to do yard work too?? But one day, I went out back for whatever reason and the lawnmower was sitting there. I decided to push it around a little and found that I like the work of it. I do the back part of the yard and the Mister does the side part and the edging with the trimmer. Housing does the front yard and all common areas though. 

2. Do you have a picture wall or picture gallery in your house (show us! <--- my addition to the question)?

 

Nope. No picture wall. I'm not big on hanging things on the wall. I have a few random whatevers here and there, but no groupings.

3. What book has influenced your thinking the most? Or, what blog? (I want to read what gets people thinking!)

 

This is a head scratcher. Still scratching my head. Hmm. Let's see...

 

Lately, I've been fascinated with Marie Antoinette's story. I think she got a really raw deal in history. I'm currently reading Secrets of Marie Antoinette:  A Collection of Letters by Olivier Bernier. I thought it was going to be a timeline of letters from Marie to her mother and vice versa as well as letters from the Comte de Mercy Argenteau to Maria Theresa (Marie's mother) and back. But the author interjects with his own thoughts and interpretations from time to time and it's clear he thinks Marie Antoinette was just stupid. His word. This novel really has me thinking right now. Back when I first read it, The Da Vinci Code really made me think too. I'm tired. This is all I can come up with right now.

4. Do you have allergies? If so, how do you handle it this time of year?

 

I have minor seasonal allergies. Nothing that really bugs me too awful much. Itchy eyes and nose mostly. If it gets to the point where I start feeling lousy a lot, I'll take an OTC allergy med. Most of the time though, I just keep tissues nearby and deal with it.

5. What's your go to meal to cook in an hurry?

 

I don't have one. If we're in a hurry for some reason, we'll either just eat out or throw a frozen meal in the microwave. 

Plant vs Weed: Week 4

I'm really beginning to think that Plantweed is actually a lily plant. Looking down in the middle of the largest plant, I can see what looks to be buds. It's just really hard to believe that something that I was growing managed to propagate on its own after being killed off by frost last year. If this really does turn out to be a lily plant, EVERYONE must go out and buy their own because they would have to be deemed the easiest flower to grow. ;) Well, aside from dandelions.

I still don't have the snails under control. The espresso didn't seem to work all that well and I keep forgetting to save my egg shells. Considering that Easter was this past Sunday and we colored a dozen eggs then turned them all into deviled eggs, I would have had a lot of egg shells. But alas, I forgot and we threw away the egg shells. Another suggestion was to put hair around plants because snails don't like to slither across hair. But the thought of doing that grosses me out. Yuck. Can you imagine a patio full of pots with hair in them?!? Eew! Shivers.

Oh. And one last thing about Plantweed:  There are seven individual Plantweeds in the pot. I discovered more young'uns while I was picking out snails this morning.

In other news...

My mother-in-law went home today after visiting us for nine days. We had an absolutely fantastic time. We did San Diego touristy things like going to the Children's Pool to gawk at the seals, dinner at the Hard Rock Cafe, shopping at Seaport Village, and we also took in an exciting Padres game. After the Padres game, she dropped the Mister and I off at the downtown Sheraton and we spent the night downtown and took in the Gaslamp. Too much of the Gaslamp to be honest, hehehe. I found two new yummy drinks that I love:  The Moscow Mule and the Lychee Girl. It had been so long since we've been out amongst people, that I had no idea what people are drinking nowadays. We sat at the bar and I watched the bartender making drinks and when she asked me what I wanted I said, "What did you just make in the mason jar?" When she told me it was a Lychee Girl, I told her that I'd take one of those. I did the same thing with the Moscow Mule which comes in a copper mug. Very cool drinks. We had so much fun. I'm sad that she went home today. Now what??

April 6, 2012: Five Question Friday

1. Would you prefer having people over for dinner or going to their house?

I'd rather just eat out somewhere I think. That way nobody has to do the dishes.

2. Favorite Bible verse and why?

Even though I'm not religious, I like the "Judge not lest you be judged" or however that goes. All I can hear in my head is Metallica's version, lol. I like it because it should apply to everyone, religious or not but hardly anyone actually abides by it.

3. What was the first concert you ever attended, and the most recent one?

The first concert I ever attended was Metallica in 1996. It was awesome. The most recent concert was the Foo Fighters last year. Best show ever.

4. The year is 2025. What are you doing, and what have you done?

Let's see. That's 13 years in the future. My kids are 26 and 29 and I am 48. I'm probably a grandma by this time. I'm either living in California or Italy. I would like to think that I've gotten my master's by this point (I mean, geez) and I'm working in a museum or in a library. What I'd really like to be doing is living in Europe and doing the historical research that I long to do.5. What's your favorite Easter treat?

I like the Reese's peanut butter eggs.

Plant vs Weed: Week 3

Other than growing, Plantweed hasn't done too much since last week. I did some research and found some things to try where the snails are concerned. First, I tried espresso. I had mixed results. While there are fewer snails, I still have snails. So, I'm going to try egg shells next. I just need to remember to save some egg shells. Here's this week's picture. I just snapped it a couple minutes ago.

As you can see, I have resisted the urge to pluck the two slivers in the pot even though I know they are weeds. They have to be. What else could they be?? I might be a bit hard to tell in this picture, but there are four Plantweeds growing and they are doing really well.

Until next week...

March 30, 2012: Five Question Friday

 

 

1. What giveaway would you like to do on your blog?

 

Easy. I don't do giveaways.

2. If you had to choose between natural artistic ability and natural athletic ability, which would it be?

 

Artistic. I've always been disappointed that I possess no artistic or musical abilities. The world can always use more beauty. Well, I suppose I could've given Pollock a run for his money because really, who can't throw paint at a canvas??

3. Do you ditch the coat the minute it becomes "spring" or are you a holdout for more cool temps?

 

I ditch the coat because I hate wearing them. When we lived in Vermont, I absolutely hated wearing those big, bulky, coats so more often than not, I wore my Marine Corps jacket even when we had -40 windchills, lol. I have a really nice leather jacket that I like to wear when we go out, but I can wear that year around here in California because we have really chilly nights even in July. Otherwise, I'll just wear a hoodie which I keep around all year.

4. What would you do if you won the mega millions lotto of 1/2 billion dollars?

 

I know this sounds totally bogus and like I'm trying to be all hoity toity, but I'd like to open up a school for kids like my Youngest child. She should be in a private school that meets her needs but we can't afford the $13,000+ a year tuition so she suffers in the public school system that is failing her miserably. So, I'd like to open a private school that has lots of scholarships and a really low tuition (ideally, I'd like it to have NO out of pocket expense for the parents) so that more families could afford to send their kids to a school that will actually help them to learn. Money shouldn't stand in they way of children learning. After I establish my school, I'm moving to Italy. I'm going to buy a really nice villa in Tuscany that's far away from everything and grow wine grapes and raise goats and alpacas. Maybe miniature horses. I'm going to send the Oldest off to a military boarding school, cuz that's where ALL teenagers should be required to go. I'm going to hire a decorator for my new villa, an Iron Chef to cook for me, a fleet of workers to clean and maintain the grounds, and a chauffeur for my new car (haven't decided what I'm getting yet though). Maybe between the school and the villa, we'll travel the world for a bit and then settle down in the villa.

5. You are at a hotel by yourself...what do you do? 

 

Order room service, lounge around in the really nice, fluffy robe, and watch a movie with a glass of wine. Then I'd call my husband and see where the hell is he at and why isn't he with me at this really swanky hotel enjoying the wine and peace and quiet!!!

Plant vs Weed: Week 2

Plant vs Weed: Week 2 Growth

As you can see in the above picture, there has been noticeable growth since the Plantweed's first post. Is that picture blurry? I'm just noticing. Sorry. Anyway, there it is. There are four different Plantweed's and then the two slender shoot things that as I said before, I'm almost definitely sure those are just weeds. I'm very tempted to pluck them out of the pot. Kind of like picking a scab. They are tempting me. But we have DRAMA!! Check it out.

Something is eating Plantweed!! The horror! I've been keeping my eye out for the culprit since I first noticed the chewing but hadn't seen anything...until this morning!! 

 Yup. We have an interloper in Plantweed's domain. You might be able to guess that since my green thumb is a wilt-y, sad, little thing, I haven't the faintest clue what to do to keep snails out of my plants. Is it egg shells? Or coffee grounds? I need to do some research. I'd rather use something organic than a store bought pesticide.

Until next week...

We're Humans. Get Over Yourself

It takes a certain kind of psyche to want to be the center of attention. I am very much an introvert so this is something that is beyond my understanding. I've never had ambitions to try out for Broadway or travel up the interstate to try my hand at acting in Hollywood. Becoming a celebrity isn't anything to which I've ever aspired. I really don't get why celebrities, who are already in the public eye, consistently insist on making themselves even more noticeable by being eccentric on top of being on television or in the movies.

Have you heard about January Jones and her placenta pills?? Placenta pills made from her own placenta. She says that she takes them for energy and that it's a normal thing to do because humans are the only animals that don't consume their placenta after giving birth. Did it ever occur to her that the reason animals consume their placentas is to protect their young from predators? Animal mothers certainly don't send it off to some kook to be dehydrated, ground up, then put into capsules. How much nutritional value could possibly be left after that process anyway? That's just ICK and nothing a person says is going to convince me otherwise.

And just when I thought I'd heard it all, I see on the Today Show this morning that Alicia Silverstone posted a video of herself prechewing her son's food and then feeding it to him directly from her mouth. I'm not sure which is more disgusting, the placenta pills or the prechewing. You can decide for yourself if you choose to click on the video link. The link is from The Huffington Post and not the Today Show, just so you know.

Bottom line:  We are humans. We were given thumbs, a developed brain, and grocery stores for a reason. We're not birds!!! The human mouth is one of the most disgusting, germ-laden things on the planet. Don't expose your babies with developing immune systems to that. We're also at the top of the food chain which means we don't have to protect our young from predators wanting to eat them. Whatever happened to some basic common sense??

March 23, 2012

HAPPY BIRTHDAY JENNIFER!!!!

 

1. If you were free to just hop in the car and drive, where would you go? Or, if you could hop a plane and go anywhere, where?

 

That's an easy one:  Great Britain. Nuff said.

2. What's your most recently read favorite book?  

I've been reading Michelle Moran's books. I'd be hard pressed to pick a favorite. She's an exceptionally gifted historical fiction writer.

3. What's your favorite Spring Break memory?

 

I have no idea on this one. I've never done wild and crazy spring breaks in Daytona or whatever. I've never done anything so spectacular for spring break that one sticks out in my mind. 

4. What do you put in your child's Easter basket? Or, for those w/o kids, what was put in your childhood basket?

 

We don't do baskets anymore. When my girls were younger, we put candy, a chocolate bunny, and a stuffed animal in their baskets. 

5. Do you get a summer haircut?

 

Lol. I'm lucky if I manage to get a haircut once a year let alone a specific one for the summer. I'm lazy about maintaining my hair. I let it grow out until I can't stand it anymore and then I go and get several inches cut off. It's getting to that unmanageable stage right now as a matter of fact. I need to make the time to get my hair chopped.

Plant vs. Weed

I have a sad, wilted, green thumb. There are a few plants that I can manage to keep alive because they require little to no effort on my part:  succulents and cacti, tomatoes, peace plants, and whatever is growing in my kitchen window. Despite this, I love flowers and plants so I continually attempt to grow them and keep killing them as well. I have a trip planned to the nursery so I can restock my pots, heheh.

Last year, the Mister and I bought several plants and flowers and put them in some empty pots that I had. I put in that white crystal-y stuff that helps the soil stay moister longer and plant food in hopes that I would be able to keep this group of plants alive longer. Well, they all lasted through to the winter months then we had frost for which the weather people gave us NO warning, and I lost these lily-looking things, my lavender plant (I was most mad about the lavender plant because it smelled so good), and another green leafy looking plant that I forget what it is...err, was. I wasn't happy because I was feeling pretty pleased with myself that I had been able to keep these plants alive and well for several months. I guess it would have been about five or six months before the frost.

Now it's spring time once again and one of my pots is growing something. I'm not sure what it is but it's in the pot that had the lily-looking plants in it. If I remember correctly, those were annuals. I didn't do anything to them when they died except pull out the dead stems and throw them in the bushes. This left a completely barren pot. So, did those lilies manage to propagate on their own before having their lives cut short by evil frost or am I growing weeds in a pot???

I took a picture of the pot this morning and I will take another one at least once a week as updates and post them to my blog. You can click on the pic to make it bigger.

Plant or Weed?

The group of leafy stuff to the left, at 10 o'clock, has been growing for about two weeks now. The slender shoot directly to the right is a weed, I'm pretty sure. The two stubby things in the middle are what the leafy things on the left look like when they first break through the soil. I'd say they are four or five days old. The slender shoot on the bottom, right is the same thing as the other shoot and like I said, I'm pretty sure they are weeds.

So, there ya go. It's a plant adventure. ;)

March 16, 2012: Five Question Friday

I have to apologize that the postings on my blog have dwindled to mostly 5QF posts. The things that I have to say right now are not meant something like a public blog and I'm having a hard time thinking of anything else to write about. I'm sure this is just temporary. ;)

1. Will you run to the store or to pick up a kid looking a mess?

 

That depends on what you call a mess. I'll go to the store with minimal makeup, ratty jeans and a raggedy sweatshirt. I'll pick up the kids (because I don't have to get out of the car to do so) in no makeup, ratty jeans, and a raggedy sweatshirt. That's about as messy as I get. There have been times when I've run out covered in paint to pick up supplies or covered in dirt while working in the yard. That kind of thing. Generally, I'm dressed in something clean with makeup on, and my hair brushed though. 

2. Do you finish a book if it's boring or you don't like it?

 

I do my very best to finish every book that I start. When it comes to books, I'm a bit of an optimist. I'm always hopeful that it will pick up at some point and the ending will blow my socks off. With some books, it's harder to be hopeful than with others.

3. Beach or mountain vacations?

 

Beach mostly. We've taken several vacations that have involved beaches but none that have involved mountains. I'm not saying no to a mountain vacation though. Right now, I'd take a couple nights in a hotel downtown without the kids and school.

4. What thing/event says "winter will end and spring is right around the corner" to you?

 

Wellllll, we don't really have winters per se. Still, I know spring is closer when the grass starts to grow and the plum tree out front gets blossoms on it. 

5. Would you prefer couples or family vacation?

 

Couples? As in myself, my husband, and other couple(s)?? I've never done that before. I'm not saying that I wouldn't, but if I'm taking a vacation with anyone other than just my husband, I'd prefer the extra people to be my kids. 

March 9, 2012: Five Question Friday

 

 

1. Are you looking forward to the time change this weekend? 

Yes and no. On the one hand, not looking forward to losing an hour of sleep. It's hard enough to get up in the morning. On the other, I like having daylight longer in the evenings.

2. Are you getting the new iPad/would you want a iPad?

 

Nope. Apple didn't make enough improvements to warrant the price tag. Heck. They didn't make enough changes to gain my interest. An iPad 2 would still suffice at this point in the game. 

3. If money was not a problem, what is the one thing you would splurge on?

 

A vacation. A kidless vacation.

4. How did you and the Mr. (or Mrs.) meet?

 

My then-sister-in-law introduced us and we went from there. 

5. Summer is right around the corner. Bikini or one-piece?

 

Ha. Yeah right. 

Tweens and Teens and Today's Technology

Simpler Times

I am officially the mother of two teenagers. What's more, I am the mother of two teenagers in 2012. It's a really different ball of wax being a parent in 2012 than it was when I was growing up. When I was a teenager, the Internet was brand new, at least having access in the home. Cell phones were still those gigantic blocky things with terrible reception, astronomical bills, and I thought only the rich and famous had them. Social media wasn't even a seed in someone's imagination 20 years ago. If you wanted to call someone a lying bitch, you had to either do it to their face or call from your clear, plastic phone, stomping about your room only so far as the cord would allow you to go. You certainly couldn't do it through the considerable buffer of text messages. Being a parent today has definite, unique challenges.

As such, I would love to know how other parents handle the Internet and cell phone rules as it pertains to their kids. Boys, girls, tweens or teen.

These are our rules:

1. No texting/calling at school unless it's an emergency
2. An adult must be in the room when kids are on the Internet (this is really hard to do IMO, but I do my best.)
3. Until they can pay for their own phone and their own line, there is no such thing as privacy.
4. The parents have all passwords for e-mail, Facebook, phones, etc.
5. Failure to comply results in loss of access. 

Right now, the Oldest is the only one with a cell phone. We've tried twice with the youngest, but with her various disabilities, she keeps breaking her phones and we've decided that she isn't at a place where she can handle the responsibility. This is good for us in that we don't have to worry about her breaking, losing, or having her phone stolen. It's bad because I like having the ability of being able to get in touch with my kids at anytime, anywhere and vice versa (assuming they actually answer when I call). It's also bad because we don't have a land line which means that the Youngest doesn't get any phone calls and when her friends text, the texts come to me which is inconvenient and annoying. Still, we haven't been able to come up with a viable solution so until she matures, we don't have another option.

The Oldest has a cell. In fact, she has an iPhone which is yet another ball of wax when compared to a non-smart phone. She averages 2000 texts a month and I don't know how many talk minutes. We never go over our minutes so I don't pay attention to minute usage. We have unlimited texting and data though. It's easy to restrict access to different things with the iPhone and Verizon also has usage controls which we have on her line. However, even when I have her texting and calling restricted during school hours, she still has access to the Internet on her phone via 3G. I don't think it's a viable option for me to restrict access to apps in the morning before school and then lift those restrictions after school, every day of the week. If there's an option for time restrictions on apps, I haven't found it.

When she's grounded from her phone, I restrict all texting and calling except to her "safe numbers" which are her dad and me, 24/7. I periodically and randomly check her texts and FB messages. Still, I'm not perfect and things get by me all the time. I like the Oldest having her phone because we play games together and whatnot (and I'm a gadget whore) but at the same time, I think a smart phone gives her too much freedom and too many ways to get into trouble.

How do other parents do it? I'm beginning to second guess myself and I'm wondering if I'm too strict and controlling or too passive when it comes to my daughters and their Internet/cell phone usage. I'd love to hear other opinions, good or bad. Call me, leave a comment, message me on FB. Just don't text. This isn't a conversation for texting, lol. ;)

March 2, 2012: Five Question Friday

 

 

1. Where is your favorite vacation spot and why?

 

The Outer Banks. It's beautiful, historic, and I have great family vacation memories there. I long to go there again. 

2. What is your biggest guilty pleasure?

 

Gaming. Yep. I'm a girl gamer. I take time away from the stresses of life and lose myself in an MMO. I play several different games and which one I play depends on my mood at the time. I only have two or three friends who would understand this which sometimes makes me wonder if I need new friends.  ;)

3. What is your favorite fashion trend right now? Or, in the past?

 

I really liked the long cardigans that women started wearing about two years ago I guess. (Not entirely sure on that because I don't pay attention to fashion trends. This is just when I started noticing people wearing them.) I have no idea if they are still trendy to wear, but I just bought myself one made of 100% alpaca Wednesday night. It's lovely. It feels like I'm wrapping myself in a warm fuzzy hug when I wear it. 

4. What are your spring break plans?

 

My mother in law is flying out for spring break. I'm looking forward to seeing her. It's been a while since we've had visitors. I just hope my stupid jury duty summons doesn't interfere.

5. What baby names do you hate?

 

I don't like overly pretentious names. That's not specific since what I deem to be pretentious may just seem cute to someone else. But, I don't really like presidential-sounding names. I also don't like anything so weird that it will surely get a kid made fun of on the playground. Bullies find enough fuel without parents setting them up for failure by naming them something dumb like Princess. I know a nurse who was working the maternity ward at her hospital when a lady had twins. She named them Cinderella and Prince Charming. I'm sorry, but that's just freaking child abuse. Not entirely fond of people using car or designer names either. I think that falls under "overly pretentious".  There should only be one Coco Chanel. What's wrong with a traditional name like Jonathan or Emma?