Freedoms, Poop, and Parenting

All we hear about these days is, "It's my right" to whatever; say what I want, go where I want, do what I want. Yeah. You'd be correct. Speaking from the point of view of an American, as a citizen of the United States, I do have certain freedoms. Speech, bearing arms, religion and all that. But those freedoms come with the responsibility of living with the consequences of my decisions and actions. Sure. I can say that I agree or disagree with gay marriage, but then I have to live with the backlash of whichever group disagrees with my opinion. I can decide to breastfeed in public, but then I have to live with the consequences of offending people that think baring my breasts in public should be considered indecent exposure. I can beat the crap out of my kids with a belt and defend my actions by saying, "It may not be the exact right thing to do, but at least my kids aren't shooting up their school." But then I have to live with my kids' hate and fear of me and the judgement of the public that believes that is abuse.

This week, two headlines have been going through my head. The first one is about the couple that changed their baby's diaper in the middle of a Starbucks. It's my opinion that the parents in question were incredibly rude and that it's just disgusting to wave around human excrement in a place where food is being served and consumed by the public. Also, the headlines for this story are so misleading. The Huffington Post, for example says, "Starbucks Diaper Change Prompts Call To Police". It wasn't the diaper change that caused the Starbucks' employees to call the police, it was the actions of the father, Alex Burgos, that prompted the call. According to the article, he became belligerent and purposely dumped coffee on the floor. Really raises my opinion of these people that they behave so childishly right after claiming they were doing nothing wrong in the first place. How would you feel if I changed my kids smelly, dirty, germ-laden diaper on your dining room table during dinner and then right after than, shoved the meat platter onto the floor for kicks? Those parents had other options than changing that diaper in the middle of the Starbucks. I've been the parent of two babies. I speak from experience.

 Secondly, I just saw this article from our local news station this morning:  "Group of Vets Refused Service at Oceanside Grill" According to the article, the Davino's Cabo Grill refused to serve a group of American Legion motorcyclists because of the vests they were wearing. The motorcyclists said that the vests were covered in pins and patches that were all military related. But, the grill has a policy not to allow patrons to "wear colors", no matter what those "colors" may or may not be associated with. I guess that this particular grill has had problems in the past with certain groups so they have a policy in place that doesn't allow people to wear clothing associating them with a group, any group. 

As you know, my husband is a Marine. I also come from a very long line of veterans serving all branches of the military. I've even lived in a place where we didn't advertise being a military family because military service members were oftentimes the targets of violence and discrimination. Even so, a policy is a policy. This group wasn't being singled out. It's like a rep from the grill said, if they allow one group to get away with violating the policy, then they have to let everyone which, in the past, has led to fights and whatnot. It's my opinion that this business, or any business, should be allowed to protect their property and their patrons. The bikers had the option to remove the vests and then be served, but they refused. Free will exercised.

It's easy, at least to me, to see both sides to each of these two stories.

Sure. As a parent, sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do. Been there, understand that. On the other hand, unless that baby had explosive diarrhea (in which case the baby should have been at home resting and not out on the town), I have a hard time believing that the parents had no other choice but to change that diaper in the sitting area of an establishment that serves food. I've been places where there wasn't a changing table in the restroom. I remember using the pad thingy that comes with diaper bags in the backseat of my car in those cases. If the situation was so immediate, why did the parents let the diaper get so full in the first place? Diapers hold a lot.    

As for the Vets, I believe in the absolute respect of our nation's Veterans. But I don't believe that being a Veteran makes you exempt for rules and laws. They were expressing their freedom of speech but the restaurant was also expressing their freedom to refuse service.

All actions, opinions, and words have consequences. Be sure you're willing to deal with those consequences when people call you on your sh--, er, I mean crap. And now that I've used my freedom of speech to express my opinions, I have to be prepared to deal with people that disagree with me. 

One last thing. Being a parent does not mean you get to behave like an inconsiderate, disrespectful, holier than thou, asshole. Being a parent does not put a golden bubble around you that allows you to violate other people's freedoms by being naked in public or exposing perfect strangers to fecal matter. Being a parent does not give you the right to behave like you are above the expected rules and norms of society. It certainly doesn't make you better than anyone else. Again. Just my opinion. 

 Ok. One more last thing. Maybe we, as Americans, should learn the difference between freedoms granted by the Constitution and free will. I'll explain what I mean. As a sentient human being, I have free will. This means that I am in control of myself and free will allows me to walk where I want, say what I want, behave how I want, etc. I could, right this minute, grab a gun and walk into a bank and and use my learned vocabulary to demand that they give me all their money. There is nothing physically stopping me from doing this. That's free will. Free will comes with consequences which means that my hypothetical actions would most likely result in my being jailed. The Constitution grants me the right to say what I want but it doesn't exempt me from negatively using my free will to say what I want when it threatens the safety of others. Those parents had the free will to change their baby's diaper in public. Free will didn't exempt them from being inconsiderate human beings. No man is an island. Unless you decide to cut yourself off from society 100%, you have to deal with the consequences of your actions. Get the difference???

Laws vs. Morals

(The following is my opinion. It is not meant as a resource for you to use to form your own opinion.)

I wanted to write this huge piece on this topic that would have been researched to within an inch of its life and cited and all of my opinions and facts backed up by scholarly, or at least, credible sources. I might still do that, but for now, this is where I'm at with this particular subject.

Gun Control

  

I’d say about 50% of what I see on Facebook are those card things, pictures, articles, and opinions about gun control. Whatever they might be.  It’s in the news almost every day. Everyone has an opinion.

Whether or not I believe in gun control, I don’t think that’s the root of the problem when it comes to gun violence. The problem began way before all of these various teenagers and adults decided to get their hands on a gun and shoot up the handiest target. The problem began way before those offenders were driven to commit these crimes.

What causes gun violence?

·      Lack of parenting.

·      Lack of morals.

·      Lack of  consideration for the consequences of our actions.

·      The stigma attached to depression and other mental disorders.

In my opinion, and from what I observe on a daily basis, parents don’t parent anymore and teachers don’t provide structure and consequences anymore. Nobody commands nor demands respect from kids. We allow kids to walk all over us. They strut around tattooed and pierced, wearing enough makeup for ten people and clothes that wouldn’t cover an infant, pretending to be adults when they still act like irresponsible kids that they are. They show up late for school or just don’t go. They disregard their curfew if they have one at all. These same kids play in the streets and vandalize people’s property either deliberately or due to a lack of respect for other people’s things. They don’t turn in homework because there is little to no consequences for doing so. They bully other kids because it’s funny, because the other kids are different in some way, because their parents and teachers don’t tell them it’s wrong. NOBODY takes ownership of their screw-ups and EVERYBODY passes the blame off onto someone or something else. A kid is failing their classes. Well, it’s the school’s fault for not teaching them. No. It’s the parent’s fault for not making them do the work. No. It’s the kids’ fault for not doing their job as a student. Pick one. You don’t have grocery money. Well, it’s the government’s fault for not handing you money. It’s the economy’s fault for not having enough available jobs. It certainly isn’t your fault for spending money on beer, drugs, cigarettes and cell phones instead of food. We don’t teach our kids the fundamentals of respect, that they are not entitled to passing grades or iPods or cell phones or trips to the mall. We don’t teach our kids that there are consequences for their actions.

Society’s moral compass has become skewed. When did it become ok to walk around with your butt and/or underwear hanging out of your pants or out the bottom of your shorts or skirts? Sometimes I see women/kids/teens (who can tell with the amount of makeup on their faces and the provocative clothes they wear) walking around my neighborhood and I honestly can’t tell if they’re hookers or not. When did it become okay to portray drug use on regular, non-late night, non-premium channels? When did crass jokes of a sexual nature become every day on TV? Our society has become accepting of these things to the point where we no longer even notice them because they have become normal.

So, if it’s ok to be a half-dressed, potty mouth, when will it become acceptable to have, to talk about, and to ask for help for mental disorders? When I finally figured out that I have depression and social anxiety, I started talking about it out loud. Almost everyone that I have told, when they heard me talk about it first, they talked about their own messed up heads. This has led me to believe that there are a lot more people out there with some sort of mental disorder, whether mild or severe, than we realize because they are too embarrassed and/or ashamed to talk about it. Bottling this stuff up inside and then compounding it with shame only makes things worse or at least seem worse.  It’s sad that people have to feel this way about something that is largely out of their control. I certainly didn’t ask to feel anxious every time I’m around people. How many of our veterans return from combat only to silently deal with PTSD and then when it becomes too overwhelming, opt for suicide?? The stigma attached to mental disorders has to go away.

These are the things that lead people to picking up guns with the intent to do harm to others or to themselves. And you know what? They also go for knives, chemicals, and other means of violence. The invention of guns didn’t facilitate the invention of violence.  People have been doing violence to each other since cavemen were defending their mastodon meat from a neighboring caveman with wooden clubs.

Are you aware of the countries where gun ownership is already against the law or where they have very strict (I’m aware that’s a relative term) gun laws? Let’s take our neighbor, Mexico. The following are the types firearms Mexican citizens are allowed to own:

            1.            Semi-automatic handguns of caliber no greater than .380 (9mm Browning, 9mm Corto, 9mm Kurz, 9mm Short, and 9×17mm). Left excepted are calibers .38 Super and .38 commander, and also calibers 9mm. [Such as] Mausser, Luger, Parabellum and Commander, as well as similar models of the same caliber of the excepted, from other brands.

            2.            Revolvers of calibers no greater than .38 Special, left excepted is caliber .357 magnum.

Land tenure owners, common land owners and farmworkers outside urban zones, may keep and carry, upon registration, one weapon of those already mentioned, or a .22 caliber rifle, or a shotgun of any caliber, except those of a barrel length shorter than 25 inches (635mm) and of caliber greater than 12-gauge (.729" or 18.5 MM).

Additionally, Article 10 of the Federal Law of Firearms and Explosives states:

(translated) The firearms that can be authorized to participants of shooting or hunting, to keep in their home or to carry with a license, are the following:

            1.            Semi-automatic handguns, revolvers and rifles of caliber .22, rimfire ammo

            2.            Handguns of .38 caliber for Olympic shooting or other competition

            3.            Shotguns in all their calibers and models, except those with a barrel length shorter than 25 inches, and calibers greater than 12-gauge.

            4.            Triple-barrel shotguns in the calibers authorized in the preceding section, with a barrel for metallic cartridges of different caliber.

            5.            High-powered rifles, of repeating or semi-automatic function, non-convertible to full-auto, with the exception of .30 caliber carbines, rifles, muskets and carbines caliber .223, 7 and 7.62mm, and Garand rifles caliber .30.

            6.            High-powered rifles of greater caliber than those mentioned in the previous section, with special permission for their use abroad, for hunting of game bigger than those present in national wildlife.

Anything of a higher caliber than those listed above are considered to be for military and police use only. Additionally, Mexican citizens are only allowed to own up to two firearms for home protection.

·      The percentage of homicides in Mexico committed with a firearm:  54.9%

Now let’s consider our other neighbor, Canada, which doesn’t have a guaranteed right to bear arms law at all.

·      Percentage of homicides in Canada committed with a firearm:  32%

 I didn’t bother to look up statistics on gun violence that did not result in death. Call me lazy.

The point I’m trying to make is that countries with strict gun laws have not eliminated gun violence and I feel safe in predicting that they will not do so, at least not in my lifetime. Probably not my children’s lifetime either. When and if various countries eliminate gun violence, people will still have the ability to strangle each other to death with their bare hands. What's the solution to that?

Limiting or eliminating American’s right to bear arms isn’t the solution to the problem of gun violence. All this will serve to do is to take firearms away from law-abiding citizens while ensuring that criminals will remain armed. You can’t end gun violence until you get rid of all the guns on the planet, including those used by the police and military. Then you also have to get rid of all the facilities capable of producing and manufacturing guns. This includes getting rid of the minds with the knowledge needed to manufacture guns. What would you, those of you in favor of eliminating gun ownership, propose that we do with those people? Take them out back and shoot them?

Dreaming up stricter gun laws is easy. Taking away guns is a tangible so-called "solution". Actually owning up to our lack of morals and ethics as a society is hard to do. It’s not something that we can actually put our hands on whereas guns are and therefore the "obvious" answer is to take them away from law-abiding citizens. Again, admitting out loud that we are making mistakes with our kids and neglecting them by not setting rules and boundaries and then enforcing those rules and boundaries is hard to do. As is not making excuses for their bad behavior. It’s hard to admit and it’s even harder to figure out a solution and then act on that solution. You can’t look at incompetence and societal degradation and then take it away and melt it down into something else the same way that you can a gun. Gun laws are easy and America is kidding itself if it thinks an easy "answer" is the actual solution to this difficult problem. It’s not even a starting point.  

And for pete’s sake. Don’t you realize that the politicians who, yesterday, didn’t have an opinion on gun control or had a relaxed opinion on gun control but today they are all about writing new gun laws to "protect" their constituents are only doing so to get or keep your vote?? Can’t we think with our own brains and stop eating that crap up with a spoon?? Hello! Obama and gay rights. Just saying.

Further Reading (may or may not have anything to do with my opinion):

http://news.brown.edu/pressreleases/2011/10/guns 

https://www.bc.edu/content/dam/files/schools/law/lawreviews/journals/bciclr/35_1/iclr_35_1_web.pdf

A vast repository of articles on the 2nd Amendment as well as a plethora of other political-type subjects. 

More: Do your own due diligence. Form your own opinion based on valid research, your own sense of ethics, and information presented from both sides of the issue. If you attend school, use your school's library to find scholarly, researched, peer reviewed articles.

Teenager Truism #7

Teens seem to have no sense of time. I'm sure this is nothing new to this generation.

The Oldest child gets up for school 10-15 minutes before it's time to leave which gives her no time at all to actually get ready for school. Wednesdays are even worse since she has to wear a uniform for JNROTC. Yet, she says that we leave for school on time every day. We don't. I don't think we've actually left on time except, maybe, for the first day of school. On time is 7:10. We leave at
7:15 or later. And believe me. That five minutes is the difference between a little and a lot of traffic at the high school.

Also, teenagers seem to have no sense of HURRY THE HELL UP!!! This is probably something that is more of an issue in a bigger city than in smaller towns because of traffic, but at least once a day, I have to wait on a teenager to cross the street. Maybe they actually hit the button to get the pedestrian "go" light, then they meander across a street that has seven lanes of traffic and a median which means, WIDE, like it's a Sunday stroll through the park and end up crossing against the light anyway. How about putting a little shuffle in your step and move it across the street MORON! More often than not, I see them cross streets without bothering to wait for the little green walking man to tell them it's ok and then walk as slow as they can while traffic backs up. They'd better think twice about doing it if I'm first in line. My goal, before we move, is to dent my bumper by bouncing one of the miscreants off of my car. I don't want to kill or permanently damage any of them. Just a bruise or two would suffice.

Teenager Truism:  Teens move at their own speed. No amount of yelling or threats seems to get them to go at a normal, productive, human pace.

P.S.

Having a cane or being in a wheelchair doesn't give you the right to cross against the light, nor does it protect you from my bumper. Just and FYI.

Teenager Truism #6

I had a scheduling snafu last week so if you think you've already seen this post, you'd be right. I pulled it and rescheduled it for the intended day, today.

I believe that this:

 Is one slippery step away from this:

Which is one nightmarish night away from this:

 Agree or disagree, that's my opinion.

My kids like to tell me that the Mister and I (me more than him) are more strict than their friends' parents. Considering the things that I've seen their friends get into (sneaking out of our house at 4 am, breaking into the elementary school and stealing, getting mixed up in drugs, etc. Just three things off the top of my head) I'll take the label of Strict and wear it proudly. If being strict keeps my kids out of jail and holds off on my becoming a grandparent a few years longer, then so be it. Ya know??

One thing that the Mister and I are strict and inflexible about it piercings. Ears are fine, body and face are not. The Mister and I paid for each of the girls to get their first holes in their ears and after that, they have to pay for any more ear piercings they'd like to have. The end. Non negotiable.

Another thing is tattoos. They have to wait until they're 18. That's it. The end. Non negotiable.

Hair, on the other hand, we give the girls free reign. The Youngest gets her hair colored naturally by the sun. I'm not kidding. She has highlights in her hair that women pay hundreds of dollars for and all she does is play outside to get hers. Free, blonde highlights courtesy of the sun. The Oldest has played around with coloring her hair for the last two years. She's used everything on her hair from Splat in a ghoulish red, to the water flavor packets from Crystal Light and Ocean Spray (you know the little packets that you put into a bottle of water? Yeah. Those.) to professional coloring, to dye in a box from Clairol. It's been an...interesting hair journey. I admit, I really hated the red. It was ugly. AND FREAKING MESSY! She ruined towels, clothes, sheets, and stained walls, the tub, and skin with that crap. She can use that stuff until the cows come home as long as she doesn't use it under my roof. EVER AGAIN. She also learned her own lesson when it came to the flavor packets. It seriously dried out her hair and caused it to have massive breakages. I had to take her to my stylist just to fix her hair. Of course, she didn't listen to me when I told her using that stuff was a mistake. My stylist had to tell her and then make her swear to the stylist, that she wouldn't use it again. Nowadays, she just colors her hair a bleach blonde out of a box. Again, it's pretty much ruining her hair and she has naturally curly hair that frizzes and the coloring is only making it worse, but there's no talking to her about it. I'm just her mom who used Sun In and lemons on her hair and has had numerous hair coloring disasters over the years. But what do I know.

Teenager truism:  It's just hair. It may break off, fall out, get chemically burned off, or look like it's out of a low-budget, B movie vampire flick, but it's just hair and will grow out and/or grow back. This comes out of my best piece of parenting advice. If you pay attention to nothing else I say, have ever said, or will ever say, if you're a parent of human children, listen to this:  Pick your battles.

Never Say Never

On Friday, I participated in Five Question Friday and posted my response. There is a "linky" module on the host's website for this, so I read through other people's responses on their blogs. I have to say, I was really surprised at the number of people who said that as a parent, they would never take their kids to McDonald's but didn't follow through. A few also said that they would never let their kids watch TV. I found both of these responses hilarious. All things in moderation people.

I never said either one of these things when I became a parent. In fact, I loved the shows that I used to watch with my kids as they were babies/toddlers. Franklin, Little Bear, Arthur, Teletubbies, umm, the one show with the yellow people that looked like they were made out of Tinker Toys. One channel we have (I can't think of which one) has some of these shows and sometimes I turn them on for background noise. I miss my kids being that age. Life was so much simpler.

As for McDonald's...You can't blame, and I firmly believe this, fast food on childhood obesity. It is in the parent's control to feed or not feed their kids these foods. Parents are to blame for childhood obesity, and maybe hormones or glands or whatever. McDonald's is a fun sometimes treat and I don't see the harm in it as long as it's not a weekly meal. I personally know some people who eat McDonald's on a weekly basis. And why is it that McDonald's is always singled out as being the "bad" fast food joint? Last time I checked, chili cheese fries were greasy, fried, fatty, and cholesterol-filled and I can name five different fast food places that have them and McDonald's isn't one of them. It's just an example. I'm only trying to say that french fries, greasy hamburgers, and giganto sodas aren't the sole property of McDonald's.

One last thing which has very little to do with this post but I've been dying to say it for MONTHS!!!

Substituting beer for soda and then being all superior because you no longer drink soda is ASININE, RETARDED, and JUST PLAIN STUPID. Gosh! I feel better finally having gotten that off my chest.

Don’t Wanna Hear It

These are things my kids, and I’m sure tons of others, say that drive me up a wall.

• “I AM!!!!”  Said in response to me telling them to something I’ve already told them to do at least once before. UGH!!
• “I’m up!” Said in response to me telling them to get out of bed in the morning for the umpteenth time.
• “I didn’t do it.” Sure you didn’t.
• “She’s bothering me.” Shut up before I bother you.
• “Do I have to?” or “I don’t want to.”
• Responses to bad grades:  “I didn’t know it was due.” or “My teacher hates me.”
• “I’m doing it!” or “I did it/I”m done.” Again, in response to me telling them to do something, usually their chores or school work, after I’ve already told them to get going at least once or when they think they’re done but I can still see dirty dishes or counters that need cleaned.
• “It’s not fair.” Whine, whine, whine.

 

I’m sure I’ll be back to update this post, lol. Leave a comment with  your kid complaints and I’ll add them too.

Two Posts in One Day

We had another household mishap. They’re starting to become routine which is scary. To refresh your memories before I tell you about the newest breakdown, our washer is still acting up and my retarded Dyson Animal is still broken. The newest thing? Our garbage disposal is broken. Let me tell you why.

I have a lazy teenager. Her only chore in our house is to unload and reload the dishwasher. For a normal person, this would take 20 minutes a day at the most. For her, it can take upwards of four or five hours depending on how much I yell and badger. Last night we had spaghetti for dinner. It took her about an hour to not clean all of the dirty dishes and to shove all of the unused spaghetti noodles down the sink which totally packed in the pipes and clogged them. Then, she neglected to tell us that she had clogged the sink up. I discovered this at about 10:45 last night when I was trying to wash my hands and the water didn’t go down the sink. I turned the garbage disposal on because 99% of the time, that’s all it takes. Nope. All this did was cause noodle water to explode out of the other side of the sink. I tell the Mister and he grabbed the plunger and tried clearing the drain that way. He plunged and all this did was pull more noodles up the drain. Then we tried running the disposal again and that’s when we had a massive geyser. Noodles and noodle water everywhere when the pipe burst its seal under the sink. By now it’s after 11 and we’re picking noodles off of ourselves and there’s nasty water all over my kitchen. The Mister took the pipes apart and snaked the drain with a wire hanger (we don’t have an actual plumber’s snake.) After some snaking and more plunging, he cleared the pipes. He put everything back together but when I tested the garbage disposal, more water started coming out of it. It blew some sort of seal on the inside of it. We know NOTHING about garbage disposals but I’m assuming it’s going to have to be replaced.

We didn’t get to bed until after midnight because we both needed showers. I literally had to pick noodles off of the Mister’s back. We were a mess. I am so not happy with my child that she should be entirely grateful that I don’t beat kids. In her roots, she’s a good kid but this laziness of hers is becoming an epidemic. And yes, I know. What else is a teen supposed to be but lazy? But GEEZ! That doesn’t mean I have to like it.

Considering the punishment and grounding I have in mind for her, my house is going to be the most un-fun place to be for the next week or so. Calgon take me away!

Left or Right?

I don't and never have considered myself to be an overly political person. I think that it is beyond ridiculous that if you call yourself a republican that you automatically agree with every other republican, that you all have the same views, and that you all have the same priorities and values. Vice versa with democrats. I call myself neither a republican nor a democrat but more of a centrist with left leanings. This may be considered odd by some because we're a military family but that's just how I am. My dad, however, would be appalled because he's very much a conservative, heheh.

I've also never been one to agree with people or ideas because of trends or because something is the "popular" choice. I make up my own mind based on facts that I can see for myself and not blindly believe what other people tell me. I like to think that I make informed decisions.

All that being said, I'm going out on a shaky limb to say the following about the President's address to students.

I've read the text of the speech myself and I don't have a problem with it and the message it is conveying: Stay in school, achieve your goals, get your diploma. What made me angry in the beginning is that the whole thing was made out to be like the President was using this speech as a method to push his agenda on our kids. Turns out, in all honesty, that that wasn't the case. I think the Whitehouse should be blamed for not presenting the speech for what it was correctly from the get go. What REALLY made me angry is that on Friday, I called my daughter's school and asked if the student's would be watching the speech today in classes. This was before the text of the speech was available to be read beforehand. I was informed that they would be recording the broadcast to show at a later date after sending home permission slips to parents first. I found out today that that wasn't, in fact, the case and that they were showing the broadcast as they deemed it appropriate to the curriculum for the day. I feel like I was lied to or at the very least, misled. In the end, I would have been angry if the Whitehouse had intended to broadcast the speech without allowing parents and educators to read the text first and know ahead of time what they were exposing the children to. In my opinion, it is the only responsible thing for parents and teachers to do, to know the materials that their kids are reading and watching before the kids actually read and/or watch it. They, and I, would do the same thing with any movie.

It also ticks me off that parents who agree with me are automatically labled as being eccentric conservatives or unpatriotic or conspiracy theorists. That kind of thinking says to me that people think that because I choose to be involved with my children's education and because I care what kinds of media that they are exposed to, that this makes me a crazy parent. I think it makes me a responsible parent and I don't defend my point of view.

Does all this make me more of a republican, fanatical conservative? I don't think so but I do think that it should be beside the point altogether. First and foremost, I'm a parent and then I'm a concerned, informed citizen. I think everyone, lefties and righties, need to get a grip.

The Good, The Bad, and The Evil

We’ve been having a lot of highs and lows lately. Lots of peaks and valleys with no plateaus. I’m very much the type of person who prefers a smooth ride rather than a roller coaster thrill. So, do you want the good or the bad first?

I’ll start with the bad. My father-in-law fell the other day on ice. He fell on concrete which resulted in a broken hip and a torn rotator cuff. The day after he fell, my brother-in-law had  surgery on his rotator cuff so he can’t help out a lot with his dad. Things in Ohio are pretty much a mess right now. The Mister is considering going up to help out but both of their recovery times are going to be a lot longer than the ten days leave he would be able to take so we’re not really sure how much of a solution that would be. Ugh!

Now for the good news…I’m up to FOUR clients now. Woot!! I still have a hard time believing that I went from being a sahm for twelve years to having so much work that I’m considering taking on my own intern or assistant of some kind. It’s crazy really. It’s a good crazy but crazy nonetheless. My working has become such a change in our household, that we are having to figure out stuff. For instance, I was up working until 10 pm last night. The oldest child takes this as her being allowed to set her own bedtime now. As a result, she didn’t get up for school this morning until she only had ten minutes to get ready before we had to leave. The house is also in a constant state of disarray. We need a system of some kind. I think the benefits of the extra income, the awesome contacts that I’m making, and the boost to my self esteem and having my own identity far outweigh the temporary chaos in my house. All changes take some adjustment time. One of the things I always put on my resume is that I’m “highly organized” which I am. You should see my spreadsheets, lol. I just need to find a way to apply my organizational skills to every day life. If all else fails, I’ll just start beating the kids and locking them in their rooms. Just kidding. Heheh. Maybe I’ll just hire a cleaning service. Who knows.

I would like to know how two income families do it. We’re certainly not the first couple to have kids and to both work. Are other people’s houses messy with their kids sneaking around and not doing as they’re told? Am I going to become one of those parents that I can’t stand who doesn’t watch their kids? Is CPS going to be knocking on my door next? And what about single moms?? They work, they don’t have a partner to help out, and they have kids and a house to take care of too. How in the heck do they do it??? There’s a solution. I just have to find it.

Growing Up

This musing wasn't inspired by The L Word, lol. Nope. It was inspired by an episode of The Riches. (I know. Is that all I do as a sahdb??More on that in a post to come.) In the episode, the guy's son gets into trouble at school with some other boys. All the boys' fathers decide to get together to figure out a way to get them out of trouble because, gosh, you can't get into Princeton with a criminal record. Where do they have this meeting of the minds? At a strip club. Hmm. This scene brought some things to mind.

If you found at as an adult that your mom, dad, or both had done...weird things while you were in high school, would you be mad about it now? For instance, say you found out that one or both of your parents were growing weed out in the back shed. Or one or both of your parents lounged in strip clubs while you were at school. Or, one or both of your parents cheated. Things of that nature. As an adult, 10, 15, or even 20 years later you find out. Are you upset?

Within the last five years, I found out that one of my parents had done something similar to one of the things that I listed above while I was in high school, about 15 or so years ago (I'll leave it to your imaginations to guess which one, lol). My initial reaction was to be pretty peeved. My reasoning was that this person was my parent, they should have been acting as such and not like some dumb teenager and/or criminal depending on the situation. Then I was thinking that while they were up to their doings, I was out being a typical teenager, breaking the rules and/or the law, heheh, why should I care? Now, I wonder how they'd feel if their grandchildren ever found out.

Don't we have higher expectations of the people raising us than for them to act like the nefarious characters we see in tv and in movies? Is that wrong? Should it even be an issue?

Don't Feel Like Posting

I had to drag myself in here. I'm not in the mood to post. I'd rather be reading my In Death book that I got yesterday, lol. I'm a little over halfway through it and it is so good!

The oldest child is giving me grief. I used to think 14 was going to be the age to dread but 11 is not exactly a picnic. She managed to get the grounding of her life today which is going to make the rest of November miserable for us all. Not that the first 11 days have been all that pleasant either. Sometimes I wish that parenting came with a handbook.

I'm going back to my book now and I'm going to try and ignore the rest of the living world.